Merry What?

Christmas happens to be my favorite holiday. I don’t love the commercialism of it, or the getting gifts. I love all of the wonderful childhood memories I have of the holidays. I love the traditions that began when I was young and have continued with my own children. I love the Christmas “spirit” that I seem to feel each season.

Most of the time.

This year our family is going to Disneyland for Christmas. WOO HOO! We leave next Wednesday and don’t return until the following Tuesday. We’ve rented a condo near the park with THREE swimming pools and a playground, for optimal child entertainment. While I SHOULD be super excited to embark on this adventure, I must admit I have a few concerns, reservations, as well as a little bit of dread. Long drive. Kids who argue. Doing “the death walk” (my orthopedic surgeons name) on a still somewhat crap-tastic knee for 12 hours a day. Boo hoo, right? I’m going to Disneyland for hell’s sake! I know it will be fun when it’s all said and done, but there is still a lot to do to get ready (and yet here I am, blogging).

The problem with Christmas this year: because we’ll be gone for the week, we didn’t decorate. ANYTHING. No tree. No lights. NADA. I didn’t want to go through the pain of decorating if we weren’t going to be here to enjoy it. It’s a lot of work for only a few weeks. And because our Disneyland trip IS our Christmas present this year, there really wouldn’t be anything to put under a tree.

The lack of decorations and missing my family celebration (a super yummy dinner and gift exchange at my parents on the 23rd each year) makes it seem like there is no Christmas this year. It just doesn’t feel the same, and therefore I’ve been a little humbug-ish. Not really against the holiday, just not into it. So it only seems appropriate to pass on this email I received from my dad.



When four of Santa’s elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as  fast as the regular ones, and Santa began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.

Then Mrs. Claus told Santa her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Santa even more.

When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.

Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.

Frustrated, Santa went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drunk all the cider and hidden the liquor.. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the  cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.

Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Santa marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said very cheerfully, ‘Merry Christmas, Santa. Isn’t this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?’

And  thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Not very many people know this.

Explore posts in the same categories: Beotch & Moan...Woe is me, Bodily Functions, Driving, Family, Kids

3 Comments on “Merry What?”

  1. erica Says:

    Haha! I love it!! I’m feeling you with the stress this season brings. Christmas is my favorite holiday, too, but it seems no matter how hard I plan and how much extra I eliminate in trying to focus on what really matters, there’s always SOMETHING that happens to throw a wrench in the system. Just repeat these five little words: The Happiest Place on Earth. DISNEYLAND. Enjoy it!!

  2. Carla Says:

    I am stealing your dad’s “letter” for my blog. CUTE!!

    Enjot Disneyland…the kids will always remember it and one day talk about the great time you all had. 🙂 Happy Holidays!!!! 🙂

  3. meggypoo Says:

    Er – I’m sure (desperately hoping) it’ll be a wonderful trip. If only I could fast forward through the work, and even the month, and have the memories of it with actually DOING it, that’d be great ;)>

    Carla- Steal away :). Let’s try to get together after the holidays. I’m obsessing over sushi lately, so maybe even just a girls lunch or something :).

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: